Thursday, July 16, 2009

Smile, You're on Candid Camera!

At least those were the words I was hoping to hear tonight in the midst of what is now the most embarrassing (and downright stupid) moment of my life.  But unfortunately, there was no hidden camera or practical joke going on, just me sitting here feeling like a fool.  And no, there's absolutely no chance I'm sharing this one.  No chance at all.

I had planned on blogging tonight about the terrible state of my poor neglected garden.  But after having this embarrassing, stupid moment, plans for that post were scratched until this weekend.  

Tonight's episode of the saga that is my life got me thinking about the last time I was really, truly, red faced, embarrassed.  You would think with 3 sons it would happen quite a bit.  Sure, they've asked the inappropriate questions loudly and in public.  And yes, those times hiding under a chair seems like a great option.  But for the most part, I think they are at the age when they are more embarrassed of me than I am of them.

So here it is, in no particular order, my previous list of mortifying moments.
  1. I once congratulated a friend I hadn't seen in awhile on her pregnancy.  Turns out she wasn't pregnant.  She wasn't very friendly after that either, come to think of it.
  2. Had to run through the 5th grade locker room completely stark naked after gym class. Don't feel sorry for me, it was my own doing after a prank I planned totally backfired.
  3. I've been pantsed both at a crowded high school dance and in front of a busy college dormitory.  No alcohol involved in either incident.  
  4. Lots of embarrassing family incidents growing up.  Having my dad sing "Why Must I Be a Teen Angel in Love" in the background every time a boy called ranks pretty high on the list.
  5. During drawing class in college, my chair completely flipped over with me in it.  I landed face first on the floor at the foot of the nude model we were drawing.  Male nude model, I should add.  And no, I wasn't drawing his rear view.
  6. My son once had a very leaky diaper as an infant.  I carried him around shopping for 30 minutes with no knowledge of this.  When I went to grab my wallet at the register I realized the diaper (and its contents) had leaked all over the entire front of my shirt.  Surely you realize I am not talking about a wet leaky diaper.  Um, no.  Let's just say the drive home was the most disgusting, revolting 10 minutes of my life.
Looking through the list, there's an awful lot of embarrassing moments involving nudity.  What's up with that?  I can assure you there was no nudity in tonight's incident.  And I'm still not telling.

9 comments:

  1. (((laughing)))!!! Thanks for cheering up my Friday.... please tell!!!!!!!!!!

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  2. You made laugh! Thank you! And I've done the pregnancy thing too... I've learned not congratulate anyone until I'm officially told about the pregnancy...

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  3. Too funny - I'm so curious now about the "most embarassing moment" - please tell....

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  4. I have to know what the newest one was! I have to know.

    I will share one of mine.

    Once as the grocery store I bent over the meat counter and leaked all over the front of my top. I had no jacket. I had to walk out of the store with giant wet circles on the front of my top.

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  5. Sorry, this one is going to the grave with me. But don't worry, I promise I'll share next time. And believe me, there will be a next time.

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  6. Ew the diaper story is the worst! That must have been horrible.

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  7. I feel you pain. I can make a fool of myself in a heart beat. Here is one. My friend thought it was be funny to pull my shorts down. He grabbed the legs and yanked. We were at a party in the back yard of a friends house. Too the surprise of my friend. I was NOT wearing underwear. I pulled up my shorts, called him a rude name and got a drink. I just held my head high and went on with the night.
    Good luck with your secret. We all have them

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